Our goal is to get Makenna home, cherish and love her everyday we are blessed to have her. In order for her to come home, we need to address her heart, airway, feeding, and temperature issues. We have solved her heart issues for now. The next issue to be addressed is her airway. Because Makenna's nasal passage is blocked and we can't tell her to breath through her mouth, she would suffocate if we took her off the ventilator. We have two options: surgically drill holes in her nose or a hole in her throat (tracheotomy). After examining Makenna, the surgeons decided that she is too small for the nose surgery. They need room for interments and her nose is just too small. So, we chose the tracheotomy option. This will give her an airway and when she gets bigger we could have the nose surgery done. Also, the trach is reversible and could be removed at a later date.
I held her a couple more times before she went in for surgery on May 17 because she could not be moved for at least a week. So, I would not be able to hold her until she healed. Now, she is a feisty little thing. Always trying to pull out her tubes and giving the nurses grief. I asked how they were going to keep her still for a week. They ended up drugging her and tying her arms down. It was hard to watch her. She hated it. It was hard seeing her after the surgery. She had the huge vent coming out of her neck and was so drugged that she looked like a doll. Lifeless and empty...
We are so blessed to have a wonderful supportive family and parents that are retired. My mom and dad drove from Utah when I started having complications and that is why my mom was here when I gave birth. My mom and I are living down in Hershey at the Ronald McDonald House, which has been such a blessing. My dad has been playing "Mr. Mom" and watching the boys while Ken works. Tom and Lib are also helping when they can We are all very busy. Mom and I visit home at least once per week and the boys have come down a couple times. It has been really hard to be divided. It feels like I have two holes in my heart. One is filled only when I am with Makenna and one is filled when I get to go home. I am never complete. I will not be complete until Makenna gets home. I hate being away from Ken and the boys, but I am advocating for Makenna and learning about the care I will need to give her when she gets home....
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